Episode 1: Taking My Life Back (A Tremendously Chaotic Beginning)

Trigger Warning: This post contains personal experiences related to career uncertainty, weight loss, food habits, finances, and mental health. Please read with care.

Hi.
My name is Aliza Akram — and welcome to what is essentially my public diary.

If you’re looking for perfectly curated Instagram aesthetics or “that girl” routines, this is not that blog.
This is the blog where I write because writing is how I survive.

As 2025 comes to an end, everyone around me is posting their wins: promotions, engagements, glow-ups, luxury trips. I’m not that person. I don’t know how to compress my life into a 30-second reel. I process things through words, and this blog is where everything spills.

This is Episode 1 of me taking my life back — slowly, imperfectly, and very chaotically.


Why This Blog Exists (And Why It’s Personal)

This blog is not a “brand voice.”
It’s my real life.

You’ll find:

  • My struggles

  • My recipes

  • My weight loss journey

  • My money mistakes (and lessons)

  • My career confusion

  • My small wins

  • My big fears

  • The systems I’m building to fix my life

If any of this is triggering for you, please don’t read ahead. I mean that sincerely.


The Grace Period: Quitting, Learning, and Accepting Reality

I’m currently in my 14-day notice period — what people call a grace period — after quitting my job as a content creator.

I took that job because I wanted to understand adulthood.
What it feels like.
What the “real world” actually looks like.

I stayed for two and a half months, and what I learned was this:

  • Private institutions are broken

  • Work culture needs serious reform

  • People are exhausted, not lazy

  • And I am not built for that version of life

am built for adulthood.
Just not exploitation disguised as “growth.”


My Career Reality: Law, Compliance & Starting From Zero (Again)

I graduated with an LLB six months ago.
I decided to pursue compliance, and yes — I am a Compliance Analyst with two years of experience.

Right now:

  • I’m actively trying on Fiverr and Upwork

  • I’m applying for on-site compliance roles

  • I want stability, not hustle culture cosplay

My 2026 goals are simple:

  1. A stable income with real savings

  2. An on-site compliance job

That’s it. No delusions. No aesthetic pressure.


The Weight Loss That Changed Everything (92 kg to 73 kg)

In January 2025, I weighed 92 kg.
Right now, I weigh 73 kg.

I lost 19 kg this year.

But more importantly — I changed how I think about food.

I used to:

  • Order extra-large meals

  • Eat two burgers in one sitting

  • Add extra cheese, extra fries, extra drinks

  • Finish everything because “it’s there”

Now?

  • I can’t even finish half a burger

  • I take food home

  • I eat it later

  • And guess what?
    Food doesn’t magically become bad overnight

One of the biggest lies I unlearned was:

“Leftover food doesn’t taste good.”

It does. We were just conditioned to overconsume.


My New Rule With Outside Food

I love cooking.
I genuinely do.

So my rule going forward is:

  • Outside food: once a week

  • Not every day

  • Not every other day

  • No emotional eating disguised as convenience

This is discipline — not restriction.


Learning How to Cook (Properly This Time)

Last year, I would cook massive quantities.
Enough to feed a small army.

No one ate it.
Because I didn’t know how to cook in portions.

Now I do.

Today, I made creamy garlic chicken, and this is what changed:

  • Half a chicken breast

  • Half a cup of milk

  • 1 tablespoon butter

  • 2–3 garlic cloves

  • 1 tablespoon cream

That’s it.

And it tasted good.

If you want the full recipe, comment and I’ll add it to this post.


The iPad, Notion, and Why Planners Changed My Brain

I’ve owned my iPad since 2021/2022.
I used it for Netflix. That’s it.

Today, I finally used it properly.

I downloaded Notion.
I hated every template.

So I went to Etsy.

And then it hit me.

I’ve been in therapy for years.
I’ve built journals that actually helped me.
Real systems. Real prompts.

A friend suggested:

“Why don’t you sell these?”

So I will.

Not aggressively.
Not scammy.
Just… there.

If you resonate, you’ll find them.
If you don’t, that’s okay too.


What You’ll Find Linked on This Blog

I’ll link everything transparently:

  • My Etsy shop (journals & planners)

  • My Fiverr

  • My Upwork

  • My tools

  • My systems

When I land a job, you’ll be the first to know.

This isn’t about selling you something.
It’s about showing you how I’m rebuilding my life in public.


Episode One: What I’m Proud Of

This year, I:

  • Graduated LLB

  • Lost 19 kg

  • Worked two on-site jobs

  • Learned how to save money

  • Stopped wasting money on things I don’t enjoy

  • Faced fears I used to avoid

That’s not small.

And next year, I want to be just as proud — not richer, not prettier — just grounded.


Final Words (Before This Gets Too Emotional)

This blog will be:

  • Messy

  • Honest

  • Structured chaos

  • Episodes, not perfection

So welcome.

My name is Aliza.
I am tremendously chaotic.
And this is me taking my life back.

Everything is linked in the sidebar.

See you in Episode 2.

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